How Do You Define Success? (The Non-Infomercial Version)

Yesterday someone asked a group of us the question: how do you define success?

His answer was much more altruistic than mine. Mine sounds something along the lines of "being able to thrive, not just survive, in day to day life, and still be happy about the way you got there." His was more like "Helping the people around me succeed, which in turn means I've succeeded." Then again, he's in management, I decided about two years ago I'd rather not be.

But this conversation came to mind again today when I was watching an author talk about a short story he's been trying to get published. He's submitted it to a small handful of professional magazines with very low acceptance rates. He's been short listed each time, but in the end rejected each time - along with some very polite and personal rejection letters. His question was "Does this mean there's something wrong with the story?"

My initial response is to remind him these are very competative markets, frequently with less than a 1% acceptance rate. There's probably nothing wrong with the story, he just needs to look at different markets. I didn't say this though, because I thought about it some more. I traced it back to previous conversations and remembered this indivual has a different definition of publishing success than I do. For him, having to lower himself to semi-pro, or even non-paying markets can be a black mark against his success.

My view is different, and since success is such a personal thing, it's not my place to try and change his definition. When I apply my own personal view of success to my writing, it doesn't look the same as other peoples. This is something I've spent a lot of time thinking about over the years. I used to think success meant being one of those 250 people who's always an NYT best seller and can live off their stories.

I've redefined that. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't walk away from it. Are you kidding me? I'd still probably sell my soul for it. But only if I got to write the contract. "You get my soul, but only if these very specific conditions are met."

(These things are based not only on my novels I have yet to find a home for, but on the handful of short stories I've sold over the last year. And these are mine. I'm in no way implying that they should or should not be yours).
- I'm willing to polish my work to make it mainstream, sellable and relatable. There are certain basic plot elements I'm not willing to remove because that destroys the nature of the story
- I'm willing to take a smaller paycheck if that means I'm more comfortable working with the publisher. I'm not willing to send my work to any jackass with Wordpress - or sign away certain copyrights - just to see my name in someone else's publication.
- I'm willing to submit my work to small POD publishers if I think that's the right place for it. I'm not willing to self publish just to be able to hold a copy of my work in my hands. I have a printer for that.

This isn't the first time I've made a ramble like this, and I'm sure it won't be the last, but as I learn more about myself and the industry (any industry, really), my defintion of success shifts and refines itself. And I think it's important for people to know what they really want from their writing, and what they are and aren't willing to compromise in order to get it.

When the day comes that you've gotten that offer from an agent, a publisher, an employer, are you going to have an idea of where your boundaries are?

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Conflict Makes the (story-telling) World Go Round

Still dealing with the aftermath of the water-heater debacle. Some of the water got into the neighbor's basement and she's pissed at us now. Don't misunderstand, I feel bad that she suffered water damage, and even told her husband as much (she won't speak to us). Even offered to help pay repair costs (but she has to speak to me for that...or send me the bill...we'll see).

But in the midst of the drama, I got some good news. Or at least, a recognition that made me grin like a silly...something...for a couple of hours. Last week, Miriam Goderich at Dystel & Goderich Literary Management posted a contest in their blog. The basic premise: if you were writing a memior about your life, what would the pitch be?

I placed amongst the finalist (first place ;-)

I'm trying to ride the fading euphoria of the announcement in the midst of the drama of the exploded water heater. I'm not big on drama in my real life. I'm even less enthralled by conflict. But at the very top of my 'things I don't like in my real life' list is 'waiting for the other shoe to drop'.

Which has led me to add another tick to my ever growing list (see excuses)of reasons I'm not writing as much as I'd like to. I think I'm withdrawing from putting my characters through conflict. I'm not having any trouble with the explosions, or the death, or the gripping grief of losing a loved one. I'm having trouble with giving any of them verbal confrontation. Maybe if I could make my characters do it more (I never used to have a problem with it), I wouldn't be such a doormat in real life ^_^

And for those kind people who said they'd read my memior if I ever wrote it...once I'm done living that chapter of my life, maybe.

Is there anything you shy away from in your writing because it bothers you in real life?

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Woe is Me...Self Pity and Conflict

I was wallowing pretty heavily in self pity this morning. My right eye is a mess, my water heater exploded last night and flooded our basement, and I was all "oh, life sucks, I'm so miserable, boo-hoo."

And then a dear writing friend of mine (I don't think she reads this blog, but she's pretty much one of the most awesome critique buddies I've ever had), turned it back on me. On Monday I had mused aloud about what kind of conflict occured in real life that I could use in my stories. For some reason, when she replied with "Well, your hot water heater could blow up, flooding your basement..."

It just made me grin. So that's my advice for the day. The next time life sucks and you have absolutely no desire to stop wallowing, put one of your characters through the same thing. Not to torture them, but because then you can have the situation turn out exactly like you want...at least on paper. It's cathardic, trust me.

Do you ever use real life events in your fiction?

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Post #80 (Go Visit Some Awesome People)

This is my eightieth blogger post on this blog. Officially, but not technically. I kind of deleted all of the posts I made a year ago because they weren't really relevant, and yesterday I deleted a draft I wasn't going to post after all, and I still have two other posts sitting in draft mode, so there aren't really 80 posts up on this blog.

But still, according to my current offical stats, this will be post number 80, so I thought I'd do something special...

...

...

Okay, how about this. Since I don't have anything else intersting to say today, instead go visit these awesome people. All of them have pretty much saved me and my pet project from myself over the last eight days, and are awesome writers and bloggers. They've talked me down, they've given me names and ideas, and their word counts have driven me to do my best. And since it's not #ff on Twitter, I'll link back to them instead. Go visit these awesome writers. I'll even give you a reason.

Dawn Embers. Dawn is writing her NaNo novel impossibly fast. She may not remember, but she agreed to let me beta read one of her novels, and I'm still looking forward to it. Most important (importance being relative) thing about Dawn - she comments on almost every single blog post I make, and of course that means she's just about the most awesome person in history ;-)

Kate Larkindale. Kate writes novels, lots of them, faster than almost anyone I know. She's got vast literary talent, and manages to randomly and successfully pick up various genres when the mood strikes. And she talked me down from deleting 15k worth of work yesterday afternoon.

Mireyah Wolfe. Mireyah is my angelic sister in demonic crime. She tells me my ideas are awesome and (I think) means it. She has some incredible ideas she turns into amazing stories, and she understands why I worship Loki. She rocks like Pop Rocks.

Ben Langhinrichs. Ben is possibly the most prolific and diverse writer I've ever had the pleasure of talking to. He also makes a fantastic NaNoWriMo pace car. He and some other writers are working on a super-sekrit novella project right now that I can't say much about (NDA and all that), but I know it's absolutely awesomeness frosted.

Tessa Conte. I don't know Tessa as well as I'd like to, but I know she's an entertaining blogger, and hosts some fantastic blog fests and blog hops. I hope to some day be able to read more than just snippets of her writing. And she helped talk me down from the ledge yesterday, too.

bretzke. I know this talented artist as of yesterday, because they helped me figure out a short name for Prometheus. Twenty-four hours later, I also know they're an awesome artist who likes pretzels.

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Where I Alienate 90% of My Online Buddies

Have I ever mentioned how much I like the whole concept of viral? An individual online comment/thread/movie/blog/etc gets linked to by the 'right' person, and suddenly the whole world knows about it. I saw three of these last week, and each blew my mind in a different way.

I am about to outright break my vow to not talk about the writing process. I only lasted a week. Eh.

1. My Son Is Gay: An amazing post about a caring mother who just wants what's best for her children. Really, the world needs more people like this
2. Cooks Source Scandal - really, how self-important do you have to be to be able to justify this type of theft?
3. Better yet, don't write that novel. The excuse I've used to break my "I won't talk about writing or NaNo" vow during November.

This is where I run the risk of alienating a large number of people. But before you stalk off all mad, know that I'm 13k words into my own NaNoWriMo 2010 piece, so obviously I'm not opposed to the event. And this is my fifth year participating, hopefully my third time finishing, so I'm also not new to it.

Did you read the article? The whole thing? No, really.

Because she's got a good point. Okay, not all of it. For instance, I 110% disagree with this: Nothing about NaNoWriMo suggests that it's likely to produce more novels I'd want to read.

I mean, in as much as one can disagree with an opinion. She's certainly entitled to her opinion.

However, I do agree with this: Why does giving yourself permission to write a lot of crap so often seem to segue into the insistence that other people read it?

And this: far more money can be made out of people who want to write novels than out of people who want to read them. And an astonishing number of individuals who want to do the former will confess to never doing the latter.

And this: Writers are, in fact, hellishly persistent;

You know what the problem is with blanket statements, though? They don't apply to everyone, even though they're positioned that way. That's my problem 1 - with the article, and 2 - with the responses to it.

Less than 5% of novel submissions to agents and publishing houses will be accepted. I've heard numbers ranging from 1-4%. Less than 10% of submissions to agents ever make it past the slush pile.

You know why? Because less than 80% of novel submissions are:

• Well-written, and or
• Follow submission guidelines, and or
• Submitted to people who represent/publish in that genre

Ever watch something like American Idol outtakes? You know, those where the singing is just so bad that your ears are bleeding after, and the judges aren't afraid to say what you're thinking? And then the singer storms out of the audition fuming because "Those judges wouldn't know talent if it bit them on the ass." All because said singer's mommy told them they were a diva.

That's who articles like this are directed at. Those people.

I don't know any of those people - at least not that I'm aware of. The writers I associate with have talent. They hone their skills. They work, and sweat, and cry, and try and balance life with art, and create beautiful stories. Yes, all of them. All of you.

You know what that means? The article isn't about you. It's not for you. Because at the end of the day, you're doing it the right way, and that puts you in the less than 20% of the entire novel writing population. You've earned the right to celebrate your work and your art. And if that means you write 50k words in November for whatever reason, awesome. And if that means you decide to edit instead, or save your month of novel writing until February, or go read 30 books in 30 days, so be it.

Don't let someone lump you into the majority when your talent sets you apart from it.

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Redecorating

*waves* Hi peoples who live in the internet.

I've been doing a little redecorating around here. I'm not quite done yet, but I'm getting close. My eye was freaking out on me this weekend so I figured: hey, Loralie, let's do something that requires you to stare intensely at the computer screen for hours on end, therefore guaranteeing your eyes will water, even if they weren't giving you problems before.

Yes, I frequently talk to myself like that. I also usually call myself by my given name instead of my screen name. About a year ago...maybe not quite that long...I had my first ever short story accepted. Time came around for me to use my pen name, like I've had sitting in reserve for years now (Ariana Richards) and something inside popped and I decided I'd rather my writing be associated with my real name instead. Problem was, I never updated my online stuff to match.

I'm doing that now, to go along with the other changes I've made. New and improved for you and me:

• Pretty new blog graphics. All drawings (the girl, the guitar player, the angel) are copyright me. Sweetie drew them for me. Please don't steal them. They may be borrowed as long as you ask permission first and link back to me.
• I'm slowly sweeping across all of my online accounts associated with my writing and updating them to reflect the name on my short stories. That way, if you support the people who published me, you'll know you're looking for work by 'Loralie Hall' when you sift through the books. (My name, my pen name, etc. Feel free to call me Ariana still. I'm used to it ^_^)
• I've added a page to the site with links to my published stories. This contains links to the online works that can be viewed for free, and anthologies from the different distributors who carry them.

I've been planning to do this for almost three months now. That's how long it's been since I purchased the apathyshero.com domain name. I think I was finally motivated this weekend because I finally got the contract and edits for the story that is my driving force. 'Apathy's Hero' should be available in 'A Thousand Faces' before the end of the month, and I can't begin to describe how excited I am about it.

So if you're bored and looking for something to browse, check out the links on my Published Pieces page, and if you're looking for Christmas gifts, check out the anthologies :-D Seriously, Daily Flash 2011: 365 Days of Flash Fiction has a 500 word or less story for every day of 2011. Who doesn't need that? ^_~

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